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Key signals/questions before you invite someone home
#1
Hi all, my game must be super rusty that this has now happened twice in last two weeks.

I invited two girls at my place - one as part of a group dinner, the other as a date. Both were super eager and quick to accept the invitation. 


One came with a champagne and desserts (group dinner one), full on flirting, and at the very end when I ask her to stay a bit longer and help me, she says she has recently started seeing someone.


The other came empty handed and 
halflway through the cooking, she tells me that she is seeing someone.

I hate such dishonesty but again they're girls and are always up for free food. My mistake to not vet them properly.

What are the couple of things you'll do beforehand, questions you'll ask before to avoid this?

Any tips welcome. Thanks.
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#2
Sounds like they might've become disinterested during the date for whatever reason. I'm seeing someone usually means I'm not interested or horny right now. They probably wouldn't come over for something like that just for free food if they're being loyal to someone. They change their minds sometimes.
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#3
(03-08-2020, 08:07 PM)Vikhammer Wrote: Hi all, my game must be super rusty that this has now happened twice in last two weeks.

I invited two girls at my place - one as part of a group dinner, the other as a date. Both were super eager and quick to accept the invitation. 


One came with a champagne and desserts (group dinner one), full on flirting, and at the very end when I ask her to stay a bit longer and help me, she says she has recently started seeing someone.


The other came empty handed and 
halflway through the cooking, she tells me that she is seeing someone.

I hate such dishonesty but again they're girls and are always up for free food. My mistake to not vet them properly.

What are the couple of things you'll do beforehand, questions you'll ask before to avoid this?

Any tips welcome. Thanks.

I wrote you a lengthy reply on my cell phone which got lost... Shorter version:

From what you write, it seems that the girls in question might have been dancing on the edge of being into you and out of you. Could it be possible that you were doing something or behaving in some way that took their beta-baits or something like that? I met some really flirty girls who mercilessly filter men out based on how they respond to it. My first thought is that you were too much into her.
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#4
Thanks guys.

For the one that came w the group, I teased and made fun or her through the date and the vibe was consistent. The only time I showed any deep interest was when I asked her to stay to help w the cleaning.

For the one that came alone, she did not bring anything- not even a small dessert or wine. That itself told me that she was acting pricey and probably was seeing someone i.e. had the mind of not coming to fuck. But I may be wrong here.

Questions:
1. What would you have done to the girl 1 as soon as she said she is taken?
2. What would you have done to girl 2 - when you saw she came empty handed. When she said she was taken.
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#5
(03-12-2020, 05:17 PM)Vikhammer Wrote: Thanks guys.

For the one that came w the group, I teased and made fun or her through the date and the vibe was consistent. The only time I showed any deep interest was when I asked her to stay to help w the cleaning.

For the one that came alone, she did not bring anything- not even a small dessert or wine. That itself told me that she was acting pricey and probably was seeing someone i.e. had the mind of not coming to fuck. But I may be wrong here.

Questions:
1. What would you have done to the girl 1 as soon as she said she is taken?
2. What would you have done to girl 2 - when you saw she came empty handed. When she said she was taken.

I haven't had much success with girls who were taken so I might be talking out of my ass, but here's my view: it's not so much about the wording, it's that any reply should signal that your mind is in zero fucks given state. That is quite hard if you have already fallen a bit into neediness so I can think that in the case of girl 1 you could have said something cocky-funny like "What a cheap way to avoid some work, you must be a communist" or "Lucky bastard. Anyway, I'll wash the dishes, you dry them."

I think it's hard to tell from the information you've given here are these girls:
a) skanks looking for attention and a free meal;
b) good girls in relationships who genuinely want only some company, but might like to flirt a little for fun;
c) girls who are in relationship but just beg for you to make a manly move and take ownership of every orifice on their body.

Since they were already there, I guess it's a combination of a) and c). If their social circle was there, that does not seem like a good start of an escalation, more like a beginning of a long social-circle-game.
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